Understanding Co-Dependence

Understanding “Co-Dependence”

By | Couples Counseling Frisco TX | No Comments

Understanding Co-DependenceFor those of you who have ever been in a relationship where you believed yourself or your partner to be “co-dependent,” it is far more likely that your relationship problems were/are due to something else. “Dependent Personality Disorder,” as it is labeled in the DSM-V is extremely rare, occurring in only 0.49% of the population. So, chances are neither you or your partner would likely meet the criteria for the diagnosis, but that’s not to say you and/or your partner didn’t both experience the struggle of negotiating separateness and togetherness.

Establishing boundaries is a normal part of every relationship and is often most difficult early on, however, if conflict continues to arise each time a person wishes to spend time separately, there may be something deeper to examine in the relationship, and you may be surprised how much taking this deeper look at the relationship patterns can truly help.

So before you write off another “doomed relationship,” consider the potential gains you might experience by gaining a deeper understanding of yours and other’s non-co-dependent attachment styles. If you are interested in learning more about your relationship patterns or personal attachment style call 469-214-4400.

Sex Addiction Counseling in Frisco, TX: Helping Your Spouse

By | Sex Addiction Counseling Frisco TX | No Comments

Sex Addiction Counseling Frisco TXSex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX is not just for the addict, but also the spouse. If you are married to someone that is addicted to sex, you need to remember that there was a reason you married them, and that with help you may be able to work through the issues you are having. However, they need your help to successfully beat their addiction.

The first step in getting sex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX is helping the addicted realize that they have a problem and getting them to agree to get help. Forcing someone into counseling or therapy isn’t the answer to healing, but showing them why they need help may be.

Signs Of Sex Addiction

There are many types of sex addiction, from the need to actually have sex often (with whomever), to masturbating addictions and pornography addiction. If you wanted to learn more about pornography addiction, check out pornaddiction.com. The problem with these addictions is that they pull couples apart because the person with the addiction is getting what they need somewhere else and lying to their partner.

Some of the obvious signs of a sex addiction include keeping secrets, the addict pulling away and not showing affection for their partner, they may spend more time away, and they may start acting differently than they used to. The results of an addiction to sex that has them sleep with multiple partners could be out of wedlock pregnancies and even the contraction of venereal diseases, which could then be spread to you, the spouse.

If your spouse has begun to show less interest in you sexually, talk to them. It could be something like depression or or other issues, but if you suspect they have been with other people, or you’ve found their porn stash or signs that they masturbate often, it may be time to talk to them and help them.

Getting Help

Once you have confirmed their addiction, no matter what type of sexual addiction it is, let them know how it is affecting your relationship and that you want to help them. Sex addiction doesn’t have to mean the end of your marriage or relationship. If they can get help and healing, your relationship can get back to normal. Just like any addiction, there is a cure, with therapy and love.

Being There For Them

You need to be there for them for your sex addicted spouse as they heal from their addiction. Sex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX can save your marriage. While it is possible that the addiction could win out, or you spouse could fall off the wagon, there is hope.

Contact the Center for Marriage and Family Counseling for Sex Addiction Counseling in Frisco, TX

If you suspect your spouse has a sex addiction, contact the Center For Marriage and Family Counseling for sex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX at 214-250-7808.

Sex Addiction Counseling Frisco TX
Center For Marriage & Family Counseling
3550 Parkwood Blvd G-706
Frisco, Texas 75034
(972) 954-2400

Photo Credit: ©Depositphotos.com/ EugenP

Sex Addiction Counseling in Frisco, TX: Put Your Life Back Together

By | Sex Addiction Counseling Frisco TX | No Comments

Sex Addiction Counseling Frisco TXWhy seek sex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX? Whatever the level of severity, sex addiction has the power to hurt you and those you love in a multitude of ways. Not only can it isolate you from your loved ones, but it can lead to increasingly self-destructive behaviors and feelings of shame. However, sex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX can help you learn to overcome your compulsions, reconnect with those you may have hurt, or simply stop destructive behaviors before they get too out of hand. Just remember that you’re not alone, and that recovery could be right around the corner. For help, call the Center for Marriage and Family at (972) 954-2400 today.

Sex Addiction Counseling Frisco TX
Center For Marriage & Family Counseling
3550 Parkwood Blvd G-706
Frisco, Texas 75034
(972) 954-2400

Sex Addiction Counseling in Frisco TX: Signs You May Have a Sex Addiction

By | Sex Addiction Counseling Frisco TX | No Comments

Sex Addiction Counseling Frisco TXAddiction is real, and those who believe they may have a sex addiction can seek help through sex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX. As people grow and learn more about themselves and the world around them, they are introduced to a variety of things that they will both like and dislike. Sometimes when people find something they enjoy, their love for this thing can turn into an addiction, but it is not always easy to tell when you have become addicted. Many like to think that they are strong and can avoid becoming an addict, but sometimes things like sex can start to take over your life before you have a chance to notice that something isn’t right.

Signs You May Need Sex Addiction Counseling in Frisco, TX

With any addiction, there are signs and symptoms that you can look for to recognize whether you have a problem or not. The following are signs that you may have an addiction and should attend sex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX:

  • You have multiple sexual partners.
  • You engage in multiple forms of sexual activity (i.e. phone sex, views pornography, uses prostitutes).
  • You are preoccupied with thoughts of sex.
  • You neglect your responsibilities like work or school to engage in sexual activity.

People with addiction have two options on how to deal with it: go to sex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX or continue to let it destroy their life. Oftentimes, when a person or their loved ones realizes that they have a problem with addiction, they will seek help. For some people, getting help does not seem necessary because they’re in denial about their addiction, but for others they have recognized the damage this addiction has done in their life and want to make a positive change.

Putting a stop to your addiction may not be easy, but with proper help and support you can get a handle on things and get your life back on track. Hopefully, after people get the help they need, they will not relapse and let their sex addiction once again ruin their life. No matter how much family may not want this to happen, ultimately it is up to the addict to want to make the change and recover from their addiction.

Anyone who believes they may have a sex addiction should seek help for their problem. For those seeking sex addiction counseling in Frisco, TX, the Center for Marriage and Family Counseling is here to help. To schedule an appointment, contact us at (972) 954-2400.

Sex Addiction Counseling Frisco TX
Center For Marriage & Family Counseling
3550 Parkwood Blvd G-706
Frisco, Texas 75034
(972) 954-2400

When Sex Becomes a Drug

By | Counseling for Sex Addiction Frisco TX, Mental Health Services Frisco TX | No Comments

Counseling For Sex Addiction Frisco TXAlthough some would argue that sex addiction does not exist (take the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders-5 for example), many others argue that it does, and back their argument with strong neurobiological evidence. Research by Patrick Carnes and Donald Hilton, among others is beginning to show that sex addiction exists and needs to be effectively treated (more on their work later). Sex addiction is an addiction, and here’s why.

Sex addiction has all of the characteristics of an addiction. The American Society of Addiction Medication describes addiction as a disease of brain reward, motivation, memory, and brain circuitry, and characterized by:

  1. Inability to consistently Abstain
  2. Impairment in Behavioral control
  3. Craving; or increased “hunger” for drugs or rewarding experiences
  4. Diminished recognition of significant problems with one’s behaviors and interpersonal relationships; and
  5. A dysfunctional Emotional response. The American Society of Addiction Medication has recently described sex addiction as an addiction in 2011. Sex addiction meets all of the characteristics of addiction. An individual with a sex addiction:
  6. Has an inability to abstain from sexual stimulation
  7. Has an impairment in behavioral control: can’t control how often and how long he/she engages in sex
  8. Experiences cravings for sexual experiences: an addict has different triggers into acting out
  9. Diminished ability to recognize problems with his/her behaviors and in interpersonal relationships
  10. Has a dysfunctional emotional response: uses sex for reward/and or relief.

Sex addiction is a process addiction or behavioral addiction, meaning that an individual is addicted to the act of sex. Sex becomes the “drug” of choice for an addict.

Sex addiction means an individual is addicted to sexual stimulation. This can take the form of an individual being addicted pornography from websites similar to www.nu-bay.com and/or masturbation addiction, having sexual encounters online, having sexual encounters in person, and/or having an affair partner/affair partners. Increased internet availability has resulted in an increase in out-of-control sexual behavior (Hentsch-Cowles & Brock, 2013). With sexual content constantly available, this “drug” can be free, always accessible, and an easy escape for an addict.

Although the “drug” in sex addiction is sex, Which you can learn more about from extremely tantalising websites similar to broxxx.com, sex addiction is not about sex. It is about emotional mismanagement. It occurs when an individual uses sex to minimize pain and painful emotions or augment pleasure. Generally, a mix of genetics and traumatic experiences underlie sex addiction. When an individual with a sex addiction feels a difficult emotion, and he/she does not have healthy ways of coping with that emotion, he/she will often turn to sex. He/she will feel a “high” with sexual release, which is very short-lived, and only helps the individual “escape” temporarily. Then the individual often feels guilt and shame (two difficult emotions), and that can start the whole process over. The individual becomes caught in the the squirrel-cage of addiction.

Sex addiction, like any other type of addiction, hijacks the reward pathways in the brain and damages brain circuits. Sex addiction, like all addictions, makes addicts lives become out of control and unmanageable. Sex addiction harms the addict’s ability to make choices and the addict’s ability to maintain loving relationships. Untreated sex addiction leads to some severe consequences, especially the longer it is untreated. Fight the New Drug, an agency campaigning against pornography, states that pornography from websites similar to sexmature.xxx itself harms the brain, relationships, and society. All forms of sex addiction have these same harmful effects. The severity of sex addiction and its consequences progresses if left unaddressed.

At Center for Marriage and Family Counseling (and LifeSTAR Dallas), we specialize in treatment for sex addiction. If you think that you have a sex addiction, schedule an appointment with us today. You are not alone. We can help!

Counseling For Sex Addiction Frisco TX
Center For Marriage & Family Counseling
3550 Parkwood Blvd G-706
Frisco, Texas 75034
(972) 954-2400

References:

American Society of Addiction Medication. (2011). Public policy statement: Definition of addiction. Retrieved from: http://www.asam.org/docs/publicy-policy-statements/1definition_of_addiction_long_4-11.pdf?sfvrsn=2#search=”sex addiction”

Fight the New Drug. (2014). Get the facts. Retrieved from http://www.fightthenewdrug.org/get-the-facts/

Hentsch-Cowles, G., & Brock, L. J. (2013). A systemic review of the literature on the role of the partner of the sex addict, treatment models, and a call for research for systems theory model in treating the partner. Sexual Addiction & Compulsivity, 20(4), 323-335. doi:10.1080/10720162.2013.845864

7 Communication Mistakes Every Parent Should Avoid

By | Family Relationship Frisco TX | No Comments

7 Communication Mistakes Parents Should AvoidYour child may be a miniature version of you — or not! — but children (ages 0-17) are not miniature adults, no matter how much they act or insist to you that they are, and no matter how much they actually believe that they are. Communication with your child will vary based on their age and stages of functioning; however, all children need you to avoid the following 7 things, in order to grow and develop in a healthy way.

  1. Do not be distracted when a child wants to talk to you. Give your individual attention. Do not try to multi-task. Do not read, watch T.V., doze off, or stay busy with other tasks. If you are too busy to talk, simply say so and make time for the child later. Otherwise, your distraction and/or impatience will be obvious to your child, causing your child’s desire to talk to you to decrease over time. Put your devices down, turn of the T.V., shut the door, etc. Let your nonverbal cues tell the child you are available.
  1. Do not say unkind words to your child. Unkind words tear children down and teach them that they are not good enough. Unkind words from parents (and other adults) cause children to have shame and low self-esteem, both of which are toxic. If you do make a mistake and say unkind words to a child, make sure that you tell them you are sorry as soon as you can and that you correct what you said. The truth is that children can be very frustrating and may make you want to say bad words all day. Take your frustrations and unkind words about your child to the Lord (if you believe in Him) or to an empty chair (if you do not) – but never take your frustrations to your child (Lund). Do take love to your child.
  1. Do not assume children can talk openly about their feelings. If children don’t want to talk, that is okay. They will share their feelings when they feel safe.
  1. Try not to jump in with words or advice until the end of the conversation. Sometimes, talking out feelings and having someone listen is all a child really wants or needs. Once a child feels heard and understood, his/her original problem may shrink into a manageable perspective or even disappear.
  1. Do not always take a child’s questions and comments at face value (Clemson University Cooperative Extension Service). Look for nonverbal cues. Nonverbal behavior such as a hunched back or curled lip can put a child’s words into context. Sometimes children speak of hidden fears and ask for reassurance indirectly with questions (Clemson University Cooperative Extension Service).
  1. Do not encourage your child to take sides. They love both of their parents. They can become confused and torn because of their love and loyalty for both parents. Do not speak negatively about the other parent in front of a child. Reassure them a child with a touch or a hug and an apology, if you make a mistake.
  1. Do not use children as a sounding board. Remember that children are just children. Look to other adults for advice when you need help with personal decisions.

These 7 things can be hard to avoid, as a parent. However, by working to avoid these negative communication behaviors with your child, you will help your child out. Improving your communication with your child will not only help your child develop more healthily, but it will also help you have a better relationship with your child. If you need help working on your communication with your child, schedule an appointment at Center for Marriage and Family Counseling today! You are not on your own.

Family Relationship Frisco TX
Center For Marriage & Family Counseling
3550 Parkwood Blvd G-706
Frisco, Texas 75034
(972) 954-2400

References:
Clemson University Cooperative Extension Service. (n.d.). Communication. Retrieved from http://www.clemson.edu/fyd/Assets/Adobe_Acrobat_files/bfs_communication.pdf
Lund, J. (2004) How to Hug a Teenage Porcupine. Covenant Communication.

Marriage Counselors Frisco TX Help Couples Suffering Emotional Abuse

By | Marriage Counselors Frisco TX | No Comments

Marriage Counselors Frisco TXAn estimated 40 to 50 percent of marriages end in divorce due to various reasons, but marriage counselors in Frisco TX can reduce this risk if you are in an emotionally abusive relationship. Of course, it is important to note that you should seek immediate help if you feel unsafe or your life is being threatened. Using this guide, you will understand the signs of emotional abuse and learn how counselors can help you and your spouse.

Signs of Emotional Abuse

The signs of physical abuse are easy to see since they almost always leave bumps, bruises, or even broken bones. Unfortunately, the signs of emotional abuse are invisible and difficult to distinguish. If you are dealing with the following, you may be in an emotionally-abusive relationship:

  • Yelling – Constant yelling is an unhealthy means of communication.
  • Names, Putdowns, Degradation – Emotional abuse includes name-calling or degrading the other person.
  • Threats – Threats to physically, emotionally, or financially hurt you are considered a form of emotional abuse.
  • Control – Physical, emotional, and financial control is also a form of abuse.
  • One-Sided Opinions – An emotionally-abusive spouse will do most of the arguing without taking your side, thoughts, and opinions into consideration.

Therapy for Emotionally Abusive Relationships

It is important to note that all married couples have differences and arguments, but constant name-calling, yelling, and threatening control are signs that you and your spouse need counseling.

Marriage counselors in Frisco TX offer treatment options to learn the causes of emotional abuse and the best course of action to save your marriage.

Individualized therapy is imperative for the abusive person in the marriage. After a few sessions, counselors are able to determine why the person is abusive to their spouse. In most cases, this abuse is a learned behavior, stemming from the abuser’s childhood. Individualized therapy will allow the abuser to work through their memories, helping them understand why they feel the need to abuse their own spouse.

Therapy is also necessary as a couple. Counselors will teach you and your spouse skills to communicate properly, without degradation, threats, or anger. Improving communication will reduce the emotionally abusive behavior, but the abuser must undergo their own individual therapy to cope and manage any anger or other emotional issues.

Therapy is an effective option for emotionally abusive relationships, but you and your spouse must work together to treat the issue and improve your marriage.

If you are dealing with an emotionally abusive spouse, contact The Center for Marriage and Family Counseling at (972) 954-2400 to meet with the caring marriage counselors in Frisco, TX.

Marriage Counselors Frisco TX
Center For Marriage & Family Counseling
3550 Parkwood Blvd G-706
Frisco, Texas 75034
(972) 954-2400

After Shattered: Betrayal Trauma

By | Sex Addict | No Comments

Sex AddictPartners of addicts experience extensive emotional and relational pain. Often, partners feel intense difficult emotions, including anger, abandonment, rejection, loneliness, sadness, depression, anxiety, fear, worry, shame, and/or guilt. They often feel “less than” and concerned about their body image, personality, and sex. Partners often feel like their hearts are shattered when they learn of their significant other’s sex addiction, and feel betrayal trauma. Partners of sex addicts often consider themselves “victims of interpersonal relational trauma” (Corley, Schneider, & Hook, 2012).

Undoubtedly, a sex addict  needs treatment. No partner of a sex addict would argue with this!  But, often, partners of sex addicts are “the unrecognized persons in the spectrum of sex addiction recovery” (Tripodi, 2006). Partners need healing too, and can benefit from therapy. Therapy support is useful for partners in overcoming betrayal trauma (Pollard, Hook, Corley, & Schneider).

Counseling with a partner of a sex addict  includes a safe environment where a partner can talk openly about her/his emotions and thoughts and have support. The ultimate goal of counseling with partners of addicts is for the counselor to be a support to the partner in a difficult time and for the partner to eventually get to a spot where the partner is emotionally healthy, not dependent on whether the addict has become emotionally healthy or unhealthy.

Partners of sex addicts need to go through three phases in counseling. The first phase is “Shock, Crisis, and Information Gathering” and focuses on processing emotions, developing healthy coping strategies, and learning about addiction and sex addiction in general. The second phase is “Normalization of the Reality: Focus Shifts from the Addict to the Self,” and focuses on the self, working through trauma. The third phase is “Advanced Recovery Issues Addressed,” where partners go deeper and explore their ways of thinking.

If you are a partner of a sex addict, you do not need to suffer alone. Set up an appointment immediately! We are here to help you. If you know someone who is a partner of a sex addict, send them the link to this article.

Sex Addict
Center For Marriage & Family Counseling
3550 Parkwood Blvd G-706
Frisco, Texas 75034
(972) 954-2400

Let Our Marriage Counselors in Frisco, TX Help Heal Your Marriage

By | Marriage Counselors Frisco TX | No Comments

Marriage Counselors Frisco TXIf you’re sad because your happy marriage isn’t so happy anymore, then our marriage counselors in Frisco, TX can help you through whatever is happening. Sometimes stress and all the day-to-day life occurrences can take a toll on a marriage, but this is where the Center for Marriage and Family Counseling can assist in getting to the bottom of what’s happening.

The sooner you seek help from marriage counselors in Frisco, TX, the faster your relationship with your spouse can heal. Facing life’s little challenges together is always the best way to resolve any conflict or day-to-day stress. Call 972-954-2400 to schedule an appointment.

Call the Center for Marriage and Family Counseling at 972-954-2400 if you feel that your marriage could use some help. With the marriage counselors in Frisco, TX, you are in good hands.

Marriage Counselors Frisco TX
Center For Marriage & Family Counseling
3550 Parkwood Blvd G-706
Frisco, Texas 75034
(972) 954-2400

Marriage Counselors Frisco TX

Marriage Counselors Frisco, TX: Know When It’s Time To Seek Help

By | Marriage Counselors Frisco TX | No Comments

Marriage Counselors Frisco TXYou may not really know when your marriage is in need of help, when it’s time to enlist the assistance of marriage counselors in Frisco, TX. Many married couples don’t realize they need help until it’s too late, until one of them has filed for divorce, or worse.

While not all marriages end in hospital visits, spousal abuse, or even divorce, if you feel like your marriage may be on the line, you may want to start to look into marriage counselors in Frisco, TX before it’s too late. Don’t wait until one of you goes overboard, or until the children catch you arguing. Get help right away and you could save your marriage. Here are a few signs that you may want to start couples therapy in Frisco TX:

If There Is A Communication Breakdown

One of the first signs your marriage is headed to trouble is a breakdown in communication. Whether you’ve simply stopped talking to one another, you only yell at each other, or you always only have negative things to say, this is a sign that something is wrong. If you’ve realized that you just aren’t communicating, you can sit down with each other and try to hash it out on your own, but if the lines don’t open back up you will need to seek professional help.

If All The Love And Passion Is Gone

If you and your spouse don’t feel that spark anymore counseling could be the answer. Sometimes love seems to slip away because people are so busy with work, raising children, and they just get too stressed out to think about love and romance. If that’s all that is happening in your marriage then it could be a quick fix. However, if you simply are no longer in love, or don’t even care about each other’s well-being, it may not be as easy of a fix, and counseling is a must.

If Someone Is Being Hurt

Verbal and physical abuse sometimes happens in marriages, and while it is a bad thing, sometimes the abuser can get help and the relationship can survive. Being hurt in a relationship isn’t always physical, and sometimes something as trivial as lying or keeping secrets can seem like a form of abuse to the spouse that is being lied to. If you have a secret you are afraid to tell your spouse, or you feel like they’ve been keeping secrets from you, a counselor can be the perfect mediator to help you get everything out in the open.

Sometimes it is hard to know when it’s the right time to seek advice, but if you think you need help don’t be afraid to contact marriage counselors in Frisco, TX. The Center For Marriage and Family Counseling may be just what you need to fix your marriage, or learn that it is truly time to let go. Contact us at 972-954-2400. You can also visit us online at www.cmfcdallas.com.

Marriage Counselors Frisco TX
Center For Marriage & Family Counseling
3550 Parkwood Blvd G-706
Frisco, Texas 75034
(972) 954-2400